The intensity of a divorce can increase for many reasons, including accusations of abuse or adultery, parenting disagreements, and financial disputes. Regardless of the reasons for the conflict, these divorces are both stressful and risky.
Protecting your rights during a high-conflict divorce can be difficult. However, it may be the best way to share control of the proceedings. Moreover, your efforts may help your divorce attorney pursue a fair judgment or settlement in your case.
5 Ways to Protect Your Rights in a Contested Divorce
You have many options for protecting your rights and potentially de-escalating the conflict, including the following:
1. Document Everything
Document everything before and during your divorce, even if you merely suspect that conflict may arise between you and your spouse. Some of the following matters might be worth documenting:
- Communications in all forms, including electronic, in-person, and telephonic
- Financial matters, including financial statements, payments, and receipts
- Any incidents involving your children
For those issues that do not produce documents, keep notes or capture video or audio recordings. Michigan is a one-party consent state, so you can record phone calls in which you participate, even if the other party is unaware of your recording.
This documentation can help your lawyer raise issues in your divorce proceeding. For example, suppose your spouse withholds some financial information. Your lawyer can use your records to force disclosure or pursue sanctions against them.
2. Allow Someone Else to Speak for You
Avoid communicating with your spouse unless necessary. If you must communicate with your spouse, keep your communications short and on point. Do not get drawn into arguments or extraneous discussions.
Instead, have your lawyer speak for you in any legal matters. Your lawyer can act objectively, and your spouse will probably not try to goad them into an argument.
Similarly, try to have someone else act as a go-between for any non-legal matters. For example, if you share custody of your children, ask a sibling, parent, or parent-in-law to help with the handoff to minimize or avoid contact with your spouse.
3. Follow Your Lawyer’s Advice
Your lawyer will advise you about many issues during the pendency of your divorce, including financial, childcare, and other matters.
By following this legal counsel, you minimize the risk that your spouse and their attorney will accuse you of violating any temporary orders in your case. If they make accusations, your lawyer can defend you by explaining that you were following their advice.
4. Minimize Your Child’s Exposure to Conflict
Try to shield your child from the conflict. Your protection can have long-term benefits for your child’s mental health. Moreover, this strategy reduces the risk of parental alienation accusations by your spouse.
Parental alienation happens when one parent drives a wedge between the child and the other parent. Many judges consider it a form of emotional abuse and may use it to issue a custody ruling against you. Therefore, avoid exposing your child to any criticism of, or complaints about, your spouse.
5. Consider Divorce Mediation
A possible solution to a high-conflict divorce is mediation. A mediator enables the parties to negotiate without direct communication. Instead, they outline their positions to the mediator, who carries the proposal to the other party. Consider using this form of dispute resolution to end your divorce and move on.
Contact Gucciardo Family Law to Discuss Your High-Conflict Divorce
Skilled legal representation can be essential during a high-conflict divorce. Contact Gucciardo Family Law to discuss how we can help you.
