4 Co-Parenting Tips for Birthdays and Milestones After a Separation

A separation or divorce does not stop your child from growing and experiencing milestones. But separation or divorce can complicate your ability to be there for your child on these big occasions.

However, by communicating openly with your child’s other parent about these events and how they can be celebrated, you can keep the focus of these days where it should be — on celebrating your child.

1. Communicate and Plan Ahead

The time to decide how to handle visitation during birthdays and momentous occasions in your child’s life is well ahead of time. Trying to make plans at the last minute is chaotic and frustrating and can tarnish the otherwise joyful celebration that should be taking place.

Therefore, you should sit down with the other parent as soon as possible and devote time to making plans about how you’ll observe these occasions.

2. Know Your “Bottom Line” and Express It Clearly

When discussing how to co-parent on your child’s birthdays and major events, it may help to write down your desires and identify which of them are priorities for you. For example, a priority for you may be to take your child out for a birthday breakfast each year, even if you are not able to spend more than four hours with them.

Identifying your “must haves” can help foster productive discussions that can lead to agreements where both parents have several of their highest priorities met.

3. Be Prepared to Compromise for Your Child’s Benefit

You will not get to spend all of the uninterrupted time you would like with your child on their birthday or important occasion. Approach discussions about big days and events in a spirit of compromise. Both parents should listen to one another’s lists of priorities and think creatively about how as many of them as possible can be met.

When doing so, it may be helpful to remember that these discussions and agreements are meant for your child’s benefit, not yours. When your child sees that both parents are getting along and making an effort to be there on the child’s special day, the child will feel loved and valued by both parents.

4. Write Down Your Agreements

Writing down your plans helps avoid ambiguity when the big day arrives. A written agreement helps ensure you and the other parent are on the same page regarding how the event will be celebrated or acknowledged.

This certainty can also allow you to anticipate the event with your child, giving them something to look forward to as the day approaches.

Get Help with Your Michigan Separation from an Experienced Family Law Attorney

Whether you have been separated for years or are contemplating separating, Gucciardo Family Law wants to help guide you through these challenging times. We can assist you in reaching an agreement with the other parent for birthdays, holidays, and every day so your relationship with your child flourishes despite your separation or divorce.

Contact Gucciardo Family Law today and request your free initial consultation with our Michigan family lawyer.