How to discuss a prenuptial agreement with your future spouse

When the champagne stops pouring, and the excitement of an engagement begins to dwindle, many soon-to-be married couples find themselves faced with a lot of choices regarding their upcoming nuptials. Venue selection and floral arrangements aside, making the decision to marry also forces couples to think about their finances and how they plan to handle their various assets once the knot is tied. One of the big legal decisions that couples have to make is whether a prenuptial agreement should be signed.

What Is a Prenuptial Agreement?
To put it simply, a prenuptial agreement (also referred to as a prenup) is a legal-binding agreement made with your future spouse that frees you from the financial rights and responsibilities that come with marriage. You and your future spouse make an agreement regarding what will happen to your various assets if death or divorce enter into the equation. Many couples who have children from previous marriages, for example, enter into prenuptial agreements as a way to ensure that the children from the previous marriage have assets set aside. Another common reason for enacting a prenuptial agreement is if a partner has a family business or family money that they would like kept in the family versus allotting half of the company or money to go towards his or her spouse in the event of a death or divorce.

How to Discuss a Prenup
If you have made the decision to move forward with a prenuptial agreement, you will inevitably have to have a discussion with your future spouse. While prenuptial agreements seem logical, in order to talk about a prenup, you have to talk about divorce. With an upcoming wedding on the horizon, no soon-to-be newlyweds want to discuss a topic as serious as divorce. In order to make the conversation go as smoothly as possible, it is first important to remember that this should be a conversation and not a list of your demands. “Considering the assets that we are both bringing into our marriage, I think we should talk about considering a prenup” is wildly different and far more approachable than, “We are getting a prenup.” Be honest about your reasons behind exploring this particular avenue and be sure to stay calm and listen to your partner’s comments and concerns. It is also important to note that a prenuptial agreement is not necessarily permanent. You and your spouse can eventually write a postnuptial agreement that lays out different terms.

Enlisting Third Party Help
There is nothing wrong with tabling the conversation and coming back to it at a later date if you and your partner begin to get worked up or are not seeing eye-to-eye. Enlisting third party help through a mediator or some form of legal counsel can also help move the conversation along in a rational and logical way. Talking to lawyers separately is also beneficial as you and your spouse can receive independent advice. If you or your partner are considering a prenuptial agreement, contact The Gucciardo Law Firm, PLLC, to go over what your options are and what terms would fit your situation best.